tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2433539191806188695.post8899636873468639807..comments2024-01-23T01:25:54.343-05:00Comments on Another Sewing Scientist: Are we too nice to each other?Another Sewing Scientisthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02945784360747028884noreply@blogger.comBlogger52125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2433539191806188695.post-30707596177442565262013-01-10T01:13:07.087-05:002013-01-10T01:13:07.087-05:00I love that you brought this up, because it links ...I love that you brought this up, because it links to a conversation I had with my husband about feedback and hobbies. I'll just say I agree with you, and go write some notes for future blogging purposes. :Dladykatzahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04046811640134997947noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2433539191806188695.post-36416619521231785032013-01-09T04:19:44.228-05:002013-01-09T04:19:44.228-05:00Nothing much I can add, but just wanted to show th...Nothing much I can add, but just wanted to show that I like this post and I agree, constructive criticism is always good. I'd like to be a person who can take criticism, if you can get over yourself it's a great way to learn!Lisahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12481065265121629150noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2433539191806188695.post-58871639942501309992013-01-08T20:18:29.636-05:002013-01-08T20:18:29.636-05:00Here's another observation. I'm hestitat...Here's another observation. I'm hestitate to even look at some of the Stitcher's subject threads since most of what is written after someone publishes a pic or link to their blog/flikr/etc. is a 'boatload' of looks great posts. The ratio of new garments/question type posts vs. praise seems to be 1 to 10-15. Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2433539191806188695.post-62118101159991568472013-01-08T11:38:37.992-05:002013-01-08T11:38:37.992-05:00I also really enjoyed this post and the comments. ...I also really enjoyed this post and the comments. Thanks for posing the question. <br /><br />I am given to understand that modern behavioral psychology research has demonstrated that positive reinforcement is much, much more effective at shaping behavior than negative reinforcement. Most of the time, even people who should know this (teachers, parents, spouses!) don't really act on it, but maybe the sewing blogosphere has developed an ethic of positive reinforcement. If so, that would be an interesting case study, because the sewing blogosphere does indeed seem to be a healthy and thriving internet subculture, with lots of engaged and excited participants.Virginia at A Sewing Lifehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15734911883557993627noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2433539191806188695.post-29239673271961463402013-01-08T00:11:26.888-05:002013-01-08T00:11:26.888-05:00I really enjoyed this post and the accompanying di...I really enjoyed this post and the accompanying discussion! Sew Hopefulhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04613468661739953359noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2433539191806188695.post-39928309671770783742013-01-07T16:53:33.552-05:002013-01-07T16:53:33.552-05:00You need to try Russian community, eh! there you w...You need to try Russian community, eh! there you will get a looooooooot of critical comments, I think! I don't know why. Sewing Svetahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03388956714942742615noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2433539191806188695.post-65742593207721645172013-01-07T11:19:05.169-05:002013-01-07T11:19:05.169-05:00I want to thank everybody again for chiming in on ...I want to thank everybody again for chiming in on this subject. There are a lot of names I'm seeing here for the first time, and I had no idea that there were so many readers, let alone so many who wanted to discuss this. <br /><br />I'm on board with the general consensus here: if we know each other IRL, we know how to comment without being misconstrued as rude; otherwise, it's best to err on the side of politeness. OTOH, if someone asks for a critique outright, then all bets are off! ;) <br /><br />I hope you all enjoyed the debate as much as I did, and that you won't hesitate to keep commenting on my posts, either good or bad. Just keep it clean, because my family reads this too. Ah, who am I kidding, they have dirtier mouths than most....Another Sewing Scientisthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02945784360747028884noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2433539191806188695.post-8626460576968937722013-01-07T10:27:39.953-05:002013-01-07T10:27:39.953-05:00Very interesting discussion. Thanks for bringing i...Very interesting discussion. Thanks for bringing it up! I must admit that if I don´t like something I simply shut up as I don´t want to offend anyone...especially when it comes to personal tast...e.g. I don´t like leopard prints can I say to someone I don´t like the print they chose? <br /><br />What´s funny is that some time ago I was showing some garment pictures to my mom (who´s also a self-taught seamstress) and she was bluntly saying...this garment has such and such problem...this is not fitting right...I was kind of shocked to see such honesty because I tended to see only the beauty and achievement...though in real life I am someone who´s pretty straightfoward. <br /><br />I think we should welcome constructive criticism...<br />Sewing Princesshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17337829909003253138noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2433539191806188695.post-47056421062668816432013-01-06T00:28:11.918-05:002013-01-06T00:28:11.918-05:00I also find it problematic to judge what is good o...I also find it problematic to judge what is good or not when it is not to my taste. I have seem some very young bloggers create interesting stuff out of jersey that I would never wear, but have seen teenagers wear, so I assume I am just behind the times. Other people snort and mutter 'wallmart sewing' under their breath. Alternatively some older ladies create technically perfect, flowery monstrocities with enough ease to accommodate a small child. Again, maybe when I older I'll be the same. Both are very proud of their skills, both have different skills, all have more skills then me. <br /><br />I only blog to hold myself accountable, because I had the sewing machine for months without taking it out of the box. I have gotten some really great suggestions and no negativity, but I would find a lot of criticism pretty hard to swallow after I spent hours on creating something that is maybe not perfect, but as perfect as I can get it for now :-) <br />Giggleshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08687447086361922862noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2433539191806188695.post-11402221075480793402013-01-05T20:39:06.063-05:002013-01-05T20:39:06.063-05:00Thanks for this discussion ! As just about everyon...Thanks for this discussion ! As just about everyone else has said if someone asks for advice then constructive criticism would be OK but if not then offering even well meaning advice could go terribly wrong.I have noticed that sometimes even a positive or neutral comment can be taken the wrong way on sewing blogs . On Amazon I have seen negative reviews of sewing books turn nasty and personal as well. I think it is easier and much safer to not leave a comment if we see something not quite right. We do not really know the people behind the blogs mostly .Janinehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14384221374769122673noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2433539191806188695.post-12642109981144497392013-01-05T15:45:39.209-05:002013-01-05T15:45:39.209-05:00What an interesting discussion. I have only been s...What an interesting discussion. I have only been sewing for a year and my creations are quite simple and a big step down to a lot of the quality out there. I blog to track my progress but I must admit - I am totally addicted to receiving comments. I guess it is validation that we seek.<br /><br />I don't have sewists around me in my family and friends so rely on the sewing community for feedback.<br /><br />If I am not happy with a garment that I have made I usually show it on my blog (if it is in a condition to be shown LOL) as part of the learning process. There have been times when I have asked opinions and the comments have been constructive. <br /><br />I also think it important not to crush the spirit of someone who is proud of their work - it may ruin all their joy in making the project - and certainly wearing it.<br /><br />I do like receiving constructive feedback - it is just a fine line to walk.<br />BeaJayhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14071033898844018967noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2433539191806188695.post-67940402428513579452013-01-05T12:53:10.756-05:002013-01-05T12:53:10.756-05:00Interesting question, and I agree with many of the...Interesting question, and I agree with many of the comments here. I wouldn't go up to someone I know in real life and say, "Hey, you know what? You could do with applying less blusher," or "Your shelving unit is a bit wonky". If someone explicitly asks for constructive criticism or for help with something, then that's different, but even then you have to be extreeeeemely talented at being tactful to not cause offence. Unfortunately writing online means that you don't get to hear the author's tone of voice or nuances, so even some things which are written with the best of intentions can be taken in the wrong way (I've said a few things in the past that have been totally taken the wrong way and it made me feel terrible).<br /><br />As for me personally, on some occasions I've explicitly asked for help with a technique or fitting issue and have been very grateful to receive that help from the online community. But when I've written about a project that I clearly love, and haven't asked for feedback, I find it mean-spirited when someone says something like, "Your stripes are a bit wonky". In my opinion, it doesn't matter if it's not perfect - you made it yourself! The DIY spirit should be encouraged, not knocked down.<br /><br />Glad you brought up the topic!Tillyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05346200271671855136noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2433539191806188695.post-29345151152247963462013-01-05T12:51:37.529-05:002013-01-05T12:51:37.529-05:00Wonderful thoughtful comments! I was going to seco...Wonderful thoughtful comments! I was going to second Tanit-Isis and say that the photographic evidence doesn't always tell the whole truth. If you can't see something in person on the body for which it was made, it's hard to get too critical. I, for one, take lousy photos! (I'm much better at scenery and texture than the human form.) And I'm personally not especially photogenic at the best of times. :) So it's really hard to analyze fit and figure suitability from one of my crappy pics. And as a few people have mentioned, a lot depends on personal taste which is very subjective. I love funky clothes in murky colours. Someone else might prefer bright prints and retro styles. Who am I to tell them they've over-fitted the bodice? Especially if they're happy with it that way.<br /><br />If I want help or criticism I'll ask for it directly!Louisahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11685532773952211627noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2433539191806188695.post-61373815098587466992013-01-05T11:13:33.395-05:002013-01-05T11:13:33.395-05:00I look at it this way--- I view being a part of th...I look at it this way--- I view being a part of the online sewing community like being a part of a real life sewing club. If you showed up to a real life sewing club meeting, and someone was showing off something new they made, would you say, "that's great, BUT you should've try pinching out a dart over here...."? Nope. I wouldn't anyway. The item is already made. Unless it was solicited. Which I think happens on blogs for the most part. Someone will say, "I love this dress, but why is it doing this weird thing over here?" For the most part, I am in awe of most things I see on people's blogs. I rarely come across an item where I think someone needs my advice. Or, they already know what the problem is, identify it themselves and plan on fixing it the next time they make something. I firmly believe in building people up unless they are specifically asking for advice. There are too many online forums where people tear each other down. Plus, you never know how tone is perceived when typing something. I, for one, know I'm much better at offering criticism in real life conversations than I am on the internet (I teach art and we do lots of critiques of work). Interesting discussion!liza janehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16916364137307894200noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2433539191806188695.post-1422570293199293662013-01-01T18:10:42.966-05:002013-01-01T18:10:42.966-05:00Thanks for bringing this up...it's something t...Thanks for bringing this up...it's something that I've been thinking about too, because criticism (constructive, of course) is how I learn. I think knowing that the author is looking for help is really what makes it okay, but I've gotten unsolicited criticism before and even though I was a little surprised at first, in the end that's what I learn from. I really appreciate the sewists who do offer help, especially when I have a blog comment relationship with them and know they speak from a place of knowledge and not just cattiness!Cation Designshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00785063344305810736noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2433539191806188695.post-29618789249797137432013-01-01T15:29:36.277-05:002013-01-01T15:29:36.277-05:00I think this is a really important discussion to h...I think this is a really important discussion to have. I've been sewing for a while, but I'm new to garments, and I'm even more new to sewing from patterns. I've always made it up as I went along and I have very little technical skill. Without the help of other, experienced sewists, I either will not grow or growth will be veeeeery slow. My feelings definitely aren't going to be hurt by someone saying "that could have a different fit, here's how you do it."<br /><br />Of course, this is also my philosophy in real life. I'm in a field where I identify I a problem, research it, and determine a solution with given resources. Discussion and feedback is not only encouraged, it is necessary to come up with a viable result. I think it's the same with sewing (for me).Mhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02945605266804468787noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2433539191806188695.post-25235031861760493202013-01-01T08:17:40.967-05:002013-01-01T08:17:40.967-05:00Maybe it's the scientist in you that lets you ...Maybe it's the scientist in you that lets you ask these questions. You know how the good Lord Kelvin supposedly said: "If you can't measure it, you can't improve it." <br />And sometimes the sewing community (to me) feels a bit like it's very reluctant to measure, for whatever reasons. Maybe because it feels too far removed from the more emotional aspects of having achieved something, and being praised for it? Because there is no good objective measurement for the success of a hand-made piece of clothing? And hence any, however well meaning and helfpul and constructive, critique feels like it's hitting home a little too closely? <br />Just my 0.02c :) <br />Happy New Year, and may it bring whatever you wish for! <br />Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2433539191806188695.post-55010177072647116712012-12-31T17:29:16.944-05:002012-12-31T17:29:16.944-05:00I've loved reading this conversation, so many ...I've loved reading this conversation, so many good points! I think for me, even if I see something that looks a little "off", I just choose not to say anything at all. It's so hard to convey tone in print, in a short comment, that I would be terrified that my constructive criticism would be taken the wrong way. And I would feel awful about that. Jillhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14989756320124172799noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2433539191806188695.post-34688931826187540982012-12-31T11:30:04.419-05:002012-12-31T11:30:04.419-05:00I know exactly what you mean - so many times on va...I know exactly what you mean - so many times on various blogs I wanted to offer a suggestion, but didn't want to upset /and or offend the author. Tone can be so difficult to convey, and I think I can be (unintentionally) blunt iRL so I'm reluctant to comment in a constructive critical way - unless it has very definitely been asked for. Postive comments are great to help encourage people but I often feel bad if someone gets all gushing comments and I don't want to be the lone voice saying ''it's great ...but maybe...'' . Great topic - but overall I'm glad the sewing community err on the side of being nice :)cuadahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07521790204825358581noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2433539191806188695.post-15313233489897760232012-12-31T02:27:33.488-05:002012-12-31T02:27:33.488-05:00Interesting post; and I agree with a few points br...Interesting post; and I agree with a few points brought up in the comments: definitely politeness is nothing to do with being female: I reckon if you really did post "please rip this apart" then plenty of people, including women, would jump straight in and do just that, immediately, and then you might wish you had not asked!!<br />My view is that if someone asks for advice *during* a make, then I would give it: but *after* the garment is finished and the maker is proudly displaying it in a finished shot, and they clearly love it; then what is to be gained by (say) telling them a solid would look better than a print, or that a size smaller would be better. THE THING IS ALREADY MADE!! Besides; they made something for themselves, yo. Automatically a win, imo.Carolynhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03156106727490224625noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2433539191806188695.post-6744654624051396272012-12-30T19:36:22.944-05:002012-12-30T19:36:22.944-05:00Hey everybody - I've been offline for most of ...Hey everybody - I've been offline for most of the past 24 hours because 1) 50cm of snow! 2) after spending hours shovelling 50cm of snow from my double driveway, we got another 10cm last night, and 3) I've been babysitting a friend's son who doesn't get along with my son, so I had to supervise them constantly to prevent them from killing each other. Whew. <br /><br />I appreciate all the opinions you've written here. I didn't mean to imply that I don't appreciate positive comments - I love them! - but sometimes I feel like if I could only manage to phrase it without being rude, I would offer some constructive criticism. And I would hope that those of you with more experience, especially in fitting, would not feel intimidated to do the same for me. I think that I'm going to put that disclaimer at the bottom of my posts from now on. And if I don't want to hear a word against it, I'll make that clear as well! (i.e. "I love this and don't anyone dare say anything different!") :)Another Sewing Scientisthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02945784360747028884noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2433539191806188695.post-10363677309257294402012-12-30T19:29:18.770-05:002012-12-30T19:29:18.770-05:00As far as crafty groups go, I've only been imm...As far as crafty groups go, I've only been immersed in the sewing community online - I'm not familiar with Instructables (must look that up). I do feel hesitant to criticize start up companies, because I know how tremendously difficult it is to start a business.Another Sewing Scientisthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02945784360747028884noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2433539191806188695.post-17316795434815828392012-12-30T19:15:23.135-05:002012-12-30T19:15:23.135-05:00Yes, I totally agree. I think it may be because we...Yes, I totally agree. I think it may be because we don't know each other IRL and are nervous about hurting feelings... especially because we know how hard we each work on our projects. Make you a deal - I'll be honest with you if you can respond in kind?Heather Louhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08273803885711033973noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2433539191806188695.post-50504144534862295632012-12-30T19:07:06.232-05:002012-12-30T19:07:06.232-05:00Yes, it's hard to know how someone will take y...Yes, it's hard to know how someone will take your comment unless you know them IRL. I know I've put my foot in my mouth inadvertently too many times to risk it online and get some kind of internet reputation as the rude sewing scientist. Another Sewing Scientisthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02945784360747028884noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2433539191806188695.post-16831688363134888592012-12-30T19:04:07.110-05:002012-12-30T19:04:07.110-05:00oops, I meant to add: I can count on another sewi...oops, I meant to add: I can count on another sewist to say something positive and make my day!Another Sewing Scientisthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02945784360747028884noreply@blogger.com